Pardon My Manners

Here are the songs the shitty pub-with-sidewalk patio-that-pays-cops-to-skirt-noise-bylaws-and-occasionally-parks-cigarette boats, rented sportscars, and/or ninetendo x-box mobiles across the street from my house has played for me already tonight, harshing not only my hawkeye exam focus but also killing future jam status at future parties and good-time events (with comments):

-"Goldigger" - Kind of gold-standard status. Maybe unkillable

-"Ery'body in the club get tipsy" (?) - Barely heard it, indifference must've killed auditory stimulus.

-"Sexy, Can I" - This song slightly ruled me, mainly on the strength of Young Berg's verse, for about 1.5 days two weeks ago. You get three quarrters through it though and he mentions "sliding up and down a pole" and it turns out "sexy" is a stripper and that's just gross. Am I just naive? Do strippers actually have "Gucci on the feet, Marc Jacobs on the thigh"? Maybe Ray J just has a pole in his house. A house pole. 

-"Flashing Lights" - unkillable. 

-"American Boy" - Heavy on the Kanye much, "Pint"? Not sure this song has "legs" really, and I don't need to listen to it vis a vis re: speakers from cars playing it all over my ears. BUT, BLITZKRIEG, anyone? "Can-Indian Boy"? Pretty good, tho not enough Canadian references.

[Woah, someone just said, "Get in there, hammer!" at the bar!]

-Some other stuff, maybe Technotronic and Public Enemy and Bob Marley or some sort of playlist that a shitty fake-pub- Guiness-sponsored satellite radio station run by part-time Pandora employees throws together. You know, later on they'll get "real" and throw on some Johnny Cash.

-If they play Wiz Khalifa or Wiley we'll see how unfuckwithable my chosen summer jams are.

Oh yeah, here's this guy, "Community Watch" (The "o" should be the picture of an open eye). He is on my street everyday either hanging out in front of his car (which he may live in) or riding his bike with the frisbee stuck in the spokes down the sidewalk, deftly weaving between pedestrians. He looks like Beethoven and I haven't figured exactly what his perversion is yet. Like maybe he falls off his bike onto people?

Also, he sometimes tries to sell his parking spot.